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Encounter with The Platinum Blonde & Lady Danger: Creative Writer Laura Mckenzie

Encounter with The Platinum Blonde


‘Did you know fake blood has an expiration date?’
No but as far as first lines go that’s pretty fucking great darling.
And I’m sure you know how many men would kill to be your-
Breakfast of bright leaf and Americano.

So tell me again that story-
You know the one where you suspend yourself from a chandelier
While singing ‘God Save the Queen’
Because you know I love it when you sing.

And tell me how you love it when you discover
That movie stars are real
And how half of Hollywood got high in your toilet
(Because it’s the only place without fire alarms).

Alas, our time is near-
Or at least your taxi is, then you leave-
And drift off into your city
Clasping the key.


Lady Danger


My love has had many martyrs,
Just ask all the boys still waiting on the dancefloor
(Shhh… I’m supposed to be in the toilets.)
And if I wear a dress three quarters of an inch too tight
At the waist
Don’t they notice?
Wide eyed boys thinking it’s Christmas
(Don’t tell them it’s actually bonfire night)
If curiosity killed the cat I’m cream to the lactose intolerant.
But it’s not my fault, blame on the first Egyptian prostitute
Who worked out men just can’t resist red lipstick.

Creative Writer | Laura Mckenzie


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